The best of this week’s quotes from my elementary students in South Korea (and some thrown in from friends too)
It’s my birthday today!!
I just wanted to point that out before we begin.
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Me: ‘You’re like a domesticated puppy.’ 
The Canadian One: ‘I’m like a half domesticated puppy that still pees on the floor sometimes.’
Me: ‘Can I put that on my blog?’
The Canadian One: ‘Not out of context!’
Context: I was sitting on the floor of the kitchen with a teapot cosy on my head while he was cleaning the top of the fridge.
No, I didn’t think the context would help either!
To be fair, after this happened, he said this about me:
The Canadian One: ‘I think of living with her the same way I do living with a puppy, one day I’m gonna come home and she will have broken something I really like.’
A mere seconds later I saved his life. Saved. His. Life. Who’s the puppy NOW?!
Moving on.
***
Kid: ‘Teacher, ummmm, tomorrow happy birthday…ummmm, do you like pencil?’
Me: ‘Yes! I love pencils!’
Kid: ‘And sticker?’
Me: ‘Yes, I love stickers.’
Kid: ‘Teacher, you Korean yes?’
Me: ‘No.’
Kid: ‘Ummmmm, happy birthday card korean me…you no?’
Me: ‘Korean teacher can tell me.’
Kid: ‘OK!!’
She runs away smiling.
***
Describing a picture:
Kid: ‘He is scared because his bride’s face is ugly.’
Kid 2: ‘She is sad because she doesn’t love bridegroom.’
***
Kid points to candy on my desk.
Kid 1: ‘Candy!’
Me: ‘The candy is for grade six.’
Kid: ‘I’m great! Kitty’s great!!’ (pointing at her friend)
Me: ‘No no, GRADE six. Not great.’
Kid: ‘Kevin is grade six!’ (pointing at another boy sitting behind her)
Kevin looks up at me.
Kevin: ‘Yes, teacher, give me your coffee.’
***
A kid has no pencil.
Me: ‘If someone gives him a pencil, I’ll give you a sticker.’
Kid, being mean to all the other students: ‘No, no, I have a pencil.’
***
Someone hits my door during a lesson. I open the door to find kids scattering and one boy standing, staring at me like a deer in headlights.
Me: ‘Who hit my door?!’
Kid: ‘I don’t know…I don’t know…’
I stare at him.
Kid: ‘I don’t know…’
Me: ‘Come here.’
Kid: ‘It was Tony!!’
***
Kid talking to me randomly about food.
Kid: ‘Oh teacher, I see, the jungle man say eat this and the people eat and then bleeeeeh…’
Me: ‘What did they eat?’
Kid: ‘Thin white ants and iguanas.’
Me: ‘Ewwww…’ 
***
Me: ‘It’s big and brown. It has a big head and four legs.’
Two kids put their hands up.
Kid 1: ‘It’s a bear!!!’
Kid 2: ‘NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!’
***
Kid: ‘Oh teacher, do you know sweater?’
Me: ‘What?’
Kid: ‘Sweater?’
I look at her, skeptically.
Kid: ‘Sweater? No? Wait…’ (to the kid next to her) ‘…Sweater? Sweater?’
Kid 2: ‘No, Twitter!’
Kid: ‘Ohhh, do you know Twitter?’
***
Me: ‘What country do you live in?’
Kid: ‘Japan!’
Me: ‘NO!! This is Korea!!’
Kid next to her, pointing at her: ‘Japan spy!!!’
***
Me: ‘What do you not want to be?’
Little Boy: ‘I don’t want to be a mom!’
***
Me, trying to get a kid to move to a different desk and pointing at am empty desk: ‘Move it!’
Kid, looking at me quizzically: ‘Movie? We watching movie?’
Me: ‘No! Move it!’
Pause
Kid: ‘Move it…? I like to move it move it?’
Me: ‘Come sit here!’
Kid, gathering his stuff: ‘I like to move it move it! I like to move it move it!’
***
Me: ‘Your final text will be in three weeks.’
Kid: ‘What?! Test last week!!!’
Me: ‘I know, it makes no sense to me either but it’s on the schedule so…we’re having a test.’
***
Submitted by Michael Holman:
When talking about good/bad habits:
Me: ‘What’s a bad habit you have?’
Girl1: ‘What is ‘habit’?’
Me: ‘Something you do every day.’
Girl1: ‘I have a bad habit of hating my baby brother.’
Girl2: ‘Me TOO!!’
At least she decided it was a ‘bad’ habit.
***
For more Quote Fridays, check out:
- ‘I am McGyver!!’ – July 13th 2012
- ‘They think we’re American.’ – July 6th 2012
- ‘He said I am sweet potato.’ – June 29th 2012
- ‘A SNOOOOOOW PERSON!’ – June 22nd 2012
- ‘I did my homework with a paintbrush.’ – June 15th 2012
- ‘Some new quotes and Top 11 quotes from The Wall’ – June 9th 2012
- ‘I am Mommy Monster!’ – May 25th 2012
- ‘Why do you have tadpoles in my class?’ – May 18th 2012
- ‘He looks smart.’ – May 11th 2012
- ‘His skin is bling bling?’ – May 4th 2012
- And, of course, in the Index
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