The best of this week’s quotes from my elementary students in South Korea (and some thrown in from friends too)
I write something on the whiteboard.
Kid: ‘Oh teacher, your font is very good.’
***

I draw a window on the board.
Kid: ‘Ou, Denmark!’
***
During a test, two boys are talking:
Me: ‘What are you doing?!’
Kid 1: ‘A test?’
***
Two boys are fighting while a girl watches. I look at her. She points at them.
Little Girl: ‘Gay style.’
***
Rumors spread through the school that the school had hired a ‘hot, Chinese-American boy’ as the new official school English teacher. This is two days later:
Kid 1: ‘Oh teacher, we have new English teacher.’
Me: ‘Really?’
Kid: ‘Yes, Haley Teacher.’
Me: ‘Oh, a girl?’
Kid: ‘No, a boy.’
Me: ‘Haley’s a girl’s name.’
Kid 2: ‘No, it’s not.’
Me: ‘Fine.’
Kid: ‘Oh, teacher, you and Haley teacher, together, love.’
Me: ‘Um…no.’
Kid: ‘Do you have boyfriend?’
Me: ‘Yes.’
Kid: ‘Is he Korean?’
Me: ‘No, he’s Canadian.’
Kid: ‘Oh, Haley teacher too! Oh, teacher, boyfriend change. Canada. Canada. Boyfriend change!!!’
Me: ‘I don’t think my boyfriend would like that.’
Kid: ‘Think about it.’
Me: ‘OK.’
***
Kid: ‘You have smart eyes.’
***
Me: ‘Do you like the beach?’
Kid: ‘No, I don’t like jellyfish but they are nice in salad.’
***
A kid tries to hand me something stupid.
Me: ‘No thanks.’
Kid: ‘In Korea culture, you should take a gift.’
***
I hand a kid a piece of candy. She looks at me, smiles and says: ‘Always look on the bright side.’
***
I throw the pen onto the desk after marking the homework as I didn’t need it anymore.
Kid: ‘Oh teacher, bad habit!’
***
A kid is messing about in class. I tell him to stop.
Kid sitting in front of him: ‘Hit him!!’
Me: ‘I can’t hit students. I’m not allowed.’
Kid 1: ‘I’ll do it!!’
Kid 2: ‘Me first!!!’
Me: ‘Stop, no…No-one’s hitting anyone!’
***
At pub quiz, answering a question regarding who sings the song that was just played:
Me: ‘Kelly Rowland.’
The Canadian One: ‘From X Factor?’
***
Me, upon receiving a text, to The Canadian One: ‘Ou, Ursula and Amy invited me over on Saturday to watch Magic Mike, eat pizza and drink vodka. I’m in!’
Pause.
Me: ‘Magic Mike is the stripper movie.’
Pause.
Me: ‘I don’t think they actually appear naked in the movie. I think it’s just about a dude who is a stripper.’
The Canadian One: ‘It’s OK. I don’t think stripper Mike is gonna jump outta the TV and rape you.’
***
For more Quote Friday’s, check out:
- ‘Giraffe is no tall.’ – September 14th 2012
- ‘Teacher’s head is sad.’ – September 6th 2012
- ‘Kids can be evil.’ – August 31st 2012
- ‘I’M NOT OK!!!’ – August 24th 2012
- ‘Ah, do you live Gangnam Style?’ – August 17th 2012
- ‘BUT I GO TO THE SEA!!’ – August 10th 2012
- ‘I’m sorry I flicked s**t at you.’ – August 3rd 2012
- ‘Teacher NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!’ – July 27th 2012
- ‘Give me your coffee.’ – July 20th 2012
- ‘I am McGyver!!’ – July 13th 2012
- ‘They think we’re American.’ – July 6th 2012
- ‘He said I am sweet potato.’ – June 29th 2012
- ‘I did my homework with a paintbrush.’ – June 15th 2012
- ‘Some new quotes and Top 11 quotes from The Wall’ – June 9th 2012
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