The best of this week’s quotes from my elementary students in South Korea (and some thrown in from friends too)

Me: ‘On Wednesday, you have your mid-term test.’

Kid: ‘No.’

Me: ‘That wasn’t a question.’

Kid: ‘Ohhh….no.’

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We come to an article titled, The Blue Planet, in our book.

Me, reading the title: ‘The Blue Planet.’

Kid, interrupting: ‘I don’t like The Blue Planet.’

Me: ‘You don’t like The Blue Planet? Do you know what it is?’

Kid: ‘Yes. I go there when I was 5 years old.’

Me: ‘Ummm, no, no, The Blue Planet is Earth. We live here.’

Kid: ‘I know. I am from Martian land.’

And she was doing all this with such a straight face and I wasn’t sure if she was messing with me or not.

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Was wearing my Angry Bear (The Canadian One’s band – Hwanan Gom in Korean) t-shirt to school. I turn to write something on the board. Grade one little girl: ‘Hwa…nan…Gom….Hwanan Gom!!!’ and then she bursts into laughter

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I take my hair out of the ponytail to cover the Korean on my t-shirt.

Kid: ‘Teacher, it’s curly and messy hair.’

Dammit. I knew I shouldn’t have taught them that!!

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Entire class, chanting: ‘Angry Bear! Angry Bear!’

Kid, looking at the bear on my shirt: ‘He’s no angry. He’s sad.’

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Girl 1: ‘Hwanan Gom!’

Girl 2: ‘ANGRY BIRD!!!’

Girl 1: ‘…no…’

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Regarding my mother arranging a surprise trip for me:

Me: ‘I messaged everyone to tell them I was excited about going to the races!’

Mam: ‘THEY DON’T KNOW!!’

Me: ‘WTF? Why do I know?!’

Mam: ‘I told them we’re going SOMEWHERE. I also told them to keep it a secret.’

Me: ‘Aaahhh…I should message them back and explain then…I’ll go do that.’

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This is why people should be glad I don’t get to vote…ever:

Me: ‘When do we find out who wins this election in America? Is it like the same day or is it weeks later like on The X Factor?’

The Canadian One: ‘The US election is NOT like The X Factor.’

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I run the Korean chapter of a South African charity here in Korea. We put on a music festival in Seoul each December to coincide with World AIDS Day (Dec 1st). We’ve raised roughly $8,500 each year (at an event that lasts maybe 4-5 hours). As a result, I spend much of October and November being interviewed by various media outlets and while I do have my stock answers prepared for almost every question, this is one I was asked last week and what I said…and then what I almost said.

Interviewer: ‘What would you say to someone who is on the fence about attending or volunteering? Why should he/she attend or volunteer?’

Me: ‘It’s a great night out and Little Travellers is an awesome organization to volunteer for. Plus you meet some wonderful people. A lot of my friends are through Little Travellers. I met my boyfriend at a Rubber Seoul event when I was a volunteer. My friend met her boyfriend when she volunteered at our photo scavenger hunt! Another friend met his girlfriend at last year’s Rubber Seoul when they were both volunteers! We like to joke ‘Little Travellers brings people together’ but it really does! You get to meet these fantastic, like-minded people out to have a good time and help a great cause and who come from all walks of life and it’s just such an excellent opportunity to meet new people.’

It took everything in my power not to add:

‘Cos there’s nothing drunk people love more than cheap drinks, good music and a chance to hook up all in the name of charity. Oh and we also give out free condoms on the night.’

But it’s true.

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