The best of this week’s quotes from my elementary students in South Korea (and some thrown in from friends too)

Yesterday was The Canadian One’s birthday and on Tuesday, I taught an Art Class in which we made ostriches.

Me: ‘I made you something at school for your birthday.’

Him: ‘Is it an ostrich?’

Me: ‘…No.’

Him: ‘It’s an ostrich, isn’t it?’

Me: ‘…No.’

Him: ‘You made me an ostrich, didn’t you?’

Me: ‘I did not make you an ostrich.’

Pause

Him: ‘It’s an ostrich, isn’t it?’

Me: ‘NOT ANYMORE IT ISN’T!’

***

On Wednesday:

Me: ‘We made cats!’

Him: ‘Did you make me a catrich?’ (cat + ostrich)

Me: ‘Yes, yes I made you a catrich….tomorrow frog….oh wait….I was trying to combine frog and dog….but it’s already a word.

***

I did, however, make him a cake.

***

Stupid Moment of the Week:

Me, after drinking two glasses of milk: ‘I feel like a cow. Oh wait, cows don’t drink milk. Nevermind.’

***

Me: ‘How are you?’

Kid: ‘Me?’

Me: ‘Yes.’

Kid: ‘Now?’

Me: ‘Yes.’

Kid: ‘I’m everything.’

***

Turns out I say ‘Ok, so…’ A LOT.

I stand in front of the class and open my book.

Entire class: ‘Ok, soooooooo…’

***

Me: ‘There is one flower.’

Grade Ones: ‘There is one flower.’

Me: ‘There is one cloud.’

Grade Ones: ‘There is one flower.’

Me: ‘No, there is one cloud.’

Grade Ones: ‘There is one flowd.’

Me: ‘CLOUD!’

Grade Ones: ‘Cloud.’

Me: ‘There is one cloud.’

Grade Ones: ‘There is one flower.’

Me: ‘I give up.’

***

Kid: ‘Me minus one sticker!’

Me: ‘You have no homework!’

Kid: ‘BUT I GO TO THE SEA…THE SEA!!’

***

Kid 1: ‘I lost my homework book CD.’

Kid 2: ‘I lost my homework book but I have the homework book CD.’

Me: ‘Well, then together you can do homework!’

***

Calling attendance:

Me: ‘Tony?’

Kid: ‘No.’

Me: ‘Where’s Tony?’

Kid: ‘Tony is…his home….’

Kid does a little dance.

Kid 2: ‘At the disco? His home is disco?’

***

From Kindergarten class submitted by April Lynn Amador:

Kid: ‘Um teacher? Sometimes I have a fart when I do the study.’

***

For more Quote Friday’s, check out:

• ‘I’m sorry I flicked s**t at you.’ – August 3rd 2012
• ‘Teacher NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!’ – July 27th 2012
• ‘Give me your coffee.’ – July 20th 2012
• ‘I am McGyver!!’ – July 13th 2012
• ‘They think we’re American.’ – July 6th 2012
• ‘He said I am sweet potato.’ – June 29th 2012
• ‘A SNOOOOOOW PERSON!’ – June 22nd 2012
• ‘I did my homework with a paintbrush.’ – June 15th 2012
• ‘Some new quotes and Top 11 quotes from The Wall’ – June 9th 2012
• ‘I am Mommy Monster!’ – May 25th 2012
• ‘Why do you have tadpoles in my class?’ – May 18th 2012
• ‘He looks smart.’ – May 11th 2012
• And, of course, in the Index