The best of this week’s quotes from my elementary students in South Korea (and some thrown in from friends too)
To kick us off for anyone who’s following, I’m currently at 25,618 words in the NaNoWriMo novel.
I’ll post an excerpt next week.
While teaching, ‘I wish I could…’:
Kid 1: ‘I wish I could fly a helicopter.’
Kid 2: ‘You no fly a helicopter! It’s dangerous!! You…ahhhhhhhh…’
Kid 3, lying on his desk: ‘I wish I could go home!!’
Same class, yesterday:
While doing finish the sentence: ‘If I could do anything, I would…’
Kid: ‘Stay home.’
While telling me three things their partner would do:
Kid: ‘If she could do anything, she would hit Helen.’
Helen, the kid sitting in front of him turns around and stares at him.
Me: ‘What ELSE does your partner want to do?’
Kid: ‘If she could do anything, she would hit me.’
His partner nods.
Me: ‘And the third thing?’
Kid: ‘Only those two.’
Me: ‘You have other classes after school, right? Like piano and violin and robot making class. What’s the robot making class called?’
Kid, deadpan: ‘Robot Making Class.’
Me, to the naughtiest kid in my grade one class: ‘Martin, stop talking. Stop moving. Stop doing everything. Just sit. Quietly. And stop moving about.’
He sits still.
I turn to write on the board.
Kid sitting near him: ‘Teacher Martin SMILING!!’
I have ‘Daiso’ written on my hand in small, black writing to remind myself to go to ‘Daiso’ store after work. One of my grade one little girls is at my desk getting her worksheet corrected. She points at my palm and looks at me quizzically.
Me: ‘My note.’
I hand her her worksheet and she sits down. A few minutes later she returns and shows me her palm. In small, tiny black writing in the exact same spot as me she’d written her name.
Kid: ‘MY note.’
While watching a video about Koko, the talking Gorilla, and her owner, who’s a woman. They hug.
Kid: ‘They married?’
Kid 2: ‘She’s old.’
Like that’s the ONLY reason the woman and the gorilla aren’t married.
Kid: ‘Teacher, you boyfriend?’
Me: ‘Of course.’
Kid looks at me skeptically.
Me: ‘I don’t understand why people say ‘quick like a bunny’. Didn’t the bunny lose the race?’
The Canadian One and I are going on a date tonight. During the week, we were discussing which restaurant to go to.
Him: ‘There’s a French restaurant but there’s muscles there and you don’t like them.’
Me: ‘I swear to God, for a second, I thought you meant strong people.’
Ever since I soaked The Canadian One’s shirt in Vanish OxyClean overnight and it removed every single trace of stains, he’s taken to soaking a range of white clothing in a bid to make them shiny and bright. It works. I’d highly recommend it.
I’m in the kitchen while the The Canadian One is hunting around for something. Upon the realization that we own three whisks of the same size, he commandeers a broken one and discovers we can use the broken whisk to stir the clothes in the bucket of water in the bathroom.
Him: ‘Oh my God, this is great!! Look! You can swish it around and look, I don’t get it on my hands.’ (waaaay more excited than one should be about the removal of stains from clothing)
I look in through the bathroom door to see him poking a white hoodie in a bucket, submerging it and, then when it floats back to the top, submerging it again.
Him: ‘This is great!’
I scrunch up my face at him.
Him: (with a slight hint of sarcasm) ‘Oh yeah, if you’re gonna include this in your quotes I’d love to see how you’re gonna explain it to people.’
Challenge accepted aaaaaaaaaaaaand completed. BOOM.
From April Lynn Amador:
From Joe Jenkinson and his kindergarten students:
Does this kid know how to pad out their homework or what?
‘Today I’m going to talk about two days. Two days means Saturday and Sunday. For example, if today was Monday, two days will be Monday and Tuesday. To tell you closely it means today and tomorrow. But today I will tell you about my weekend. I wrote about more than one day. I will tell you about my weekend. I will tell you about Saturday and Sunday. My grandma came.’
For more Quote Friday’s, check out:
- ‘Throw in giant spiders.’ – November 9th 2012
- ‘Hey, don’t call people pandas!’ – October 26th 2012
- ‘I am NO potato.’ – October 19th 2012
- ‘I am from Martian Land.’ – October 12th 2012
- RE: Obama: ‘I don’t wanna see his mustache all over the TV’ – October 5th 2012
- ‘Teacher, STOP TALKING!’ – September 28th 2012
- ‘Oh teacher, your font is very good.’ – September 21st 2012
- ‘Giraffe is no tall.’ – September 14th 2012
- ‘Teacher’s head is sad.’ – September 6th 2012
- ‘Kids can be evil.’ – August 31st 2012
- ‘I’M NOT OK!!!’ – August 24th 2012
- ‘Ah, do you live Gangnam Style?’ – August 17th 2012
- ‘BUT I GO TO THE SEA!!’ – August 10th 2012
- ‘I’m sorry I flicked s**t at you.’ – August 3rd 2012